Notes to Self
Thoughts on psychology, spirituality and soft skill development for personal improvement
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Flirting with Romance
"To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance." - Oscar Wilde
Ambiguity is the first rule of flirtation. Surprise is another basic element of romance. Mystery is enticing, secrecy is suspect.
Few women can resist a sharply dressed man.
Mystery is good. But if you're not going to tell her where you're taking her, be sure to tell her what to wear.
Lunch is the safest first date. Never ask a first date if he or she believes in love at first sight. After the things that first attract you, notice the hands.
An old but worthy axiom: Don't do it on the first date. If you don't sleep together on the first date, it won't matter so much if he doesn't call. If you don't try to sleep with her on the first date, she'll be intrigued enough to go out with you again.
Persistence pays. But, if you are turned down three times in a row, stop asking. Obsession is not romance.
Always have a plan for a date. Don't ask, "So, what do you want to do?"
If he opens the car door for you, unlock his side before he comes around.
A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. Learn basic punctuation.
Call when you say you will. Follow through. Head games only create heart aches.
Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep the standard for the rest of your life.
There are enough healthy people in the world that there is no excuse to fall in love with the emotionally challenged. Try not to be the first romance after someone's painful break-up. Let some other sucker go through the recovery period.
Romance treads a thin line between love and lust. The line between love and lust is as fine as that dividing love and hate.
In the beginning, believe everything.
A small gift or bottle of champagne stashed along the path of a moonlight walk is priceless. But romance will dissolve very quickly in large amounts of alcohol.
Memorize her favorite color, flower and scent. Memorize his favorite sport, color and food. Write down her dress, shoe and ring sizes. Write down his shirt, pant and shoe sizes.
When a man offers to make dinner, he's either a better cook than you or he's getting serious.
Doing a man's laundry is romantic, until he expects you to do it.
No one can read your mind.
Bring her flowers when you haven't done anything wrong, or she'll think you've done something wrong whenever you bring flowers. When he stops bringing flowers, buy some for him.
If a man's friend finds you attractive, you will only be more attractive to him. If a women's friend finds you attractive, pretend you don't notice. She'll love you for it.
Save water - shower together. Condoms mean never having to say you're sorry.
Recognize what you can't change about someone - almost everything. (The only time a woman can change a man is when he's a baby.)
The first gift to a woman should be large enough for you to catch if she throws it at you. While an electric drill may be the perfect gift for a man, few women are thrilled with a vacuum cleaner for a birthday present. A gift of cologne to a man is tricky: if it's not what he wears he'll wonder who you knew who wore it.
Never forget that men are just boys who are older. Allow him to show off.
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